Why you should embrace single mothers (including yourself)!!!!
–When you do basic things people are amazed. I mean seriously most of the time your surprised you can even go out the door looking halfway normal let alone do awesome things like you do every day. For two years after my son was born I went to school full-time to finish up my college (which I FINISHED, and recently became a college graduate. Sure it took 7.5 years but I got it done!). I also worked every chance I got. I was amazed at myself that I was even able to go to school and work 6 days a week for TWO YEARS. Yes that is ONE day off a week. ONE DAY! We had our own place so I had no one helping me when I got home. But, we were happy. We survive and we thrived. We had a great life even though I was stretched so thin. I still gave my son everything that he could have possible needed and how did I did it?. Because we can get through anything, which is my next point.
-You can get through pretty much everything. Why? Because you have to. You don’t have anyone to say “you get up this time in the middle of the night.” You do it all. And you do it because well frankly you’re freaking awesome. And because it’s like this automatic thing that goes off. If it has to get done, you bet your going to get it done.
–People rally around you. Everyone looks at you with that eye of how the hell does she do it look. And you tend to form relationships with numerous people that you might not have normally otherwise formed because when you are in a relationship you tend to stay in your bubble. You DON’T HAVE to go out and do things on your own. But, when you are forced to get out of your bubble you find some amazing people and you find out that friends turn into family and family is so very important.
-You realize that it’s not a mom and DAD that make a family it’s a whole mountain of people. A village. A town. A church. A few friends banding together. Whatever it is to you, you and a bunch of other people are raising this child. The things you had thought you needed in order to raise a child change. And you are OKAY with that! Why? Well, because besides the fact that you’re just awesome, your kid is pretty awesome too and that’s because you have some amazing people helping you out along the way.
-You get to be anything you want. A mom. A superhero. A pain in the ass when your kid is 16 and you know they are hanging out with some people they shouldn’t be (but are probably WAY better than friends you had at 16). You are a teacher. A leader. A definition of a strong women. You can teach your child anything and everything because nobody is telling you what to do. You also get to learn along the way. To grow. To evolve. You get to be the best softball coach and the biggest cry baby at all their graduations. You get to be you, in all your glory and your child gets to see that.
-Frankly you’re just awesome. You do it all. You get through it. And you do it being completely blind really not knowing what to expect but do it anyway. When someone says they don’t know how you do it all, you just sort of smile and go on, but you aren’t really sure how you do it either other than you are too awesome not to!
Seriously to all the parents out there keep being awesome. Single parent or not. You are how the child sees the world. The easiest thing about being a parent is just BEING. Being there for your child. Being there for the good times and the bad. The first days, the first loves the first experiences. Being present is the most important thing you can EVER do for your child. Even if you don’t get to see them every day and the other parent has them, there are so many ways you can be present in their lives. Write letters, send pictures, support the other parent. And most of all do everything you can do to make sure your child has the best life that they can. Because that is what being a parent is all about!
Until next time! I hope everyone is having a lovely Thursday!